It's Fall?

Well it's supposed to be fall, but it feels more like summer around here.  Today's high is 95!  UGH ~ why is it that summer hits us just when I'm ready for cooler weather and warmer food?  Always the way....so I'm trying to enjoy it in my white pants and tank top.  BUT ~ I've already started decorating for fall....I bought a whole mess of pumpkins on Saturday and pulled out everything orange and leafy from the attic. The hubs even helped me collect pinecones for our front porch decor {awwww, he's sweet}. I promise to post pictures as soon as it's all done.  I'm kinda mid stream right now.  

We're on a hunt right now for a {drum roll please}.....

An airstream trailer!  

Something older ~ hopefully either of our birth years.  It doesn't have to be spiffed up and perfect because we think that will be the fun part.  Really we're looking for something that's been well cared for and is the right price.  We'll shine it up and make it our own.  I don't know how much "camping" we'll do.  It might be parked in our back yard as a kitschy guest house....we'll see how things turn out.

And also on my mind right this second is my handbag.  I bought a Gucci purse last year some time.  It was a big deal for me because I love Gucci, but always, always, ALWAYS hesitate based on price.  Last year I did it.  I bought a black Italian leather handbag with gold hardware.  It's a boho style with a rounded square bottom.  

I think it's an older version of this bag, and all black, without the signature stripes.  So not like this at all....

It goes with anything and I just knew it would last a lifetime which was why I bought it.  Well ~ today the hardware on one of the straps broke.  It BORKE!  I called and it seems as if they'll be able to repair it which was a relief, and likely part of the high price.  But I'm still a bit sad.  You know how you get connected to a purse and it's like a friend.  You know where all your do-daws fit and you can reach in blindly to find things?  I guess I'll have to part with my friend for a little bit while she gets repaired.  

Hopefully it won't be too long.

That's all for now.

Happy Fall ~ if it feels like Fall where you are.

If not, Happy Indian Summer!

Hugs,

Carrie

Struggles

Sometimes it seems like life is good.  Great even!  We wander through our days without a care in the world.  Happiness and joy seem to be the primary emotions in our repertoire of feelings.  Even the bad things that sneak in aren't that bad.  Each day is greeted with excitement and a smile for what it may bring.

And then there are other times.  Darker, more difficult times.  Times when we wonder where the happiness and joy went and why it's been gone for so long.  Days when it feels as if it's hard to breath because of the weight of the stress you're carrying and the day is greeted with fear of what might come your way next.

Unfortunately, I'm in one of those dark times.  I've not really ever experienced something this profound and long lasting.  In the past I've been busy and stressed.  Worried about tasks on my list that I hadn't yet completed but needed to be finished urgently.  Piled too much on my plate leaving me juggling too many things at once and needing to be everywhere at the same time.  What I would consider typical of a busy mom who owns her own business and runs a home.

But this is different.  This is a stress I've never known.  These feelings are completely unfamiliar to me and it seems like I don't have the tools to handle them, which is also frightening.  So many of the things happening in our life are out of our control.  Decisions not yet made by people who don't really know or understand us, seem to have our lives on hold right now.  

I know, and the hubs reminds me, that we can only control what we can, and deal with all other things as they come.  But it's hard.  I find my mind so overactive that I don't sleep at night because I can't force my brain to turn OFF!  Sometimes it seems like the list I have going is so big and daunting that I don't even know where to start which means I don't start.  I just walk away from it and hope I'll have a better understanding the next day.  

I know what's going on in my life will be over eventually and that it's part of owning a small business, the nature of our economy right now, and having children who, despite the guidance we give them, are still their own people and will make mistakes.  I also know that I'm blessed beyond belief because we're healthy and safe and have each other.  But I could really use some joy right now.  

Hugs,

Carrie

Holy Missoni Target!

Have you heard?  

Of Course you've heard ~ Missoni did a line for Target and it was in stores TO Day.  

If you haven't been, don't bother.  It's all gone.  

G.O.N.E. 

Gone.

Like the rest of the country, I've seen the commercials and have been looking forward to the launch dates.  So this morning after I dropped my kiddos at school I ran over there to chiggity check things out.  {Back story ~ I live in Napa and even though our town isn't very big, we have 2 Tarjays.  The one near my house is small but it's where I normally go because of proximity & convenience even though the other T to the Arget is bigger and has a much larger selection.}  

Today, I drove to Big Target thinking they would have the full Missoni line.  As I was walking in, I spotted 2 friends walking out of the store with FULL carts.  I jokingly asked if they'd cleaned out the store and they said..."We didn't, but it's all GONE!!!"

I thought they were kidding.  I was wrong.  Not a joke.  They shooed my away and rushed me into the store to give me the best chance of finding anything that might be left.  I took their cue and HUSTLED!

I ended up finding several items and throwing anything I liked into my cart thinking I could try things on at home and return them if need be.  

The store was CRAZY!  It was full of women in their 20s and 30s wearing workout clothes, big sunglasses, and ponytails grabbing everything in sight.  Literally pushing one cart and pulling another.  THOUSANDS of dollars worth of discount designer couture.  The feeling of the frenzy only reenforced my need to gather all things Missoni!  I was just as insane as the rest of 'em thinking "Certainly I need every scarf on the shelf.  I can't leave anything behind!"

As I was checking out I noticed an employee walking with a hand bag and she placed it on the display.  I told my cashier to hold on so I could run over there and grab it.  As I headed there, my eye on the bag, an old lady saw me coming and shot her cart in between me and the one and only hand bag!  Now, I'm a bargain shopper, and in a frenzied state of Missoni Mania ~ but I'm still a lady so I didn't bum rush the old broad, knock her down and snatch that bag outta her hand.  Even though the thought may have crossed my mind...

Looks like it was just as difficult to buy Missoni online.

I know I went overboard ~ and I'll try on my items and return what I don't love.  I just felt so much pressure to buy so it wouldn't be gone!

An Anniversary

Just over a year ago my grandmother passed away.  

We had known for nearly two weeks that the end was near and had held vigil at her bedside 24 hours a day.  We sang songs with her, listened to opera, watched baseball, we talked to her and shared memories with her.  There were countless kisses and hugs given to her.  

We said I love you as often as possible.  My mother even prayed the Rosary for her every day -- I had never seen my mother pray before those two weeks.  And even though my grandmother's room was full more than it was empty during those days, she left us while only my mom and dad were with her.  

You think you're ready when you're given time to process the inevitable.  

I read {although reluctantly} the pamphlet given to our family by hospice.  

I had had my time alone with my grams and said goodbye to her every time I left her side.  

I had forgiven her of the ugliness we had in our past and I asked her to forgive me.  

Thanked her for the love and devotion she had given to me over my lifetime.  

The care she gave me when nobody else could.  

But what I learned when I answered my phone and heard the news of her passing, 

was that no amount of preparation will alleviate or minimize the heartbreak that comes from the loss of a loved one.

Sunday marked one year.  

It was a difficult day for me, and if I'm being honest, it had been a hard 

2 weeks leading up to the anniversary.  

I miss her so much, I think of her every day and my heart aches, still, in a way I've never known.

Hugs,

Carrie

House of fifty

I'm sure you all have heard that the 2nd issue of the House of Fifty e-zine is live.  

I have just scanned through the first few pages

{do you do that? Scan first and read second when you get a magazine?} 

anyway, I had to take a break to share how fabulous it is. 

You must go here and look at the prettiness

Hugs,

Carrie

I've been neglecting my blog

I feel so badly about not paying enough attention to my little blog ~ and my few followers.  It's been a little hectic at our house lately, and it doesn't seem like the end is anywhere near.  So, I wanted to pop in and give a quick update about my 

life over the last couple of weeks..

During my last post I talked about the possibility I might have a chance at getting a bib for the ever popular Nike Women's {half} Marathon.....Well, I got in!  

I'm not sure if that exclamation point represents fear or excitment.  

Either way, I have very little time to prep for 13.1 miles and I still have not started.  

I hate me

Our numero uno son {as in first born, not favorite} is playing his 2nd year of high school football {which I LOVE}.  And this year we're hosting the team/family 

dinner at our house ~ tomorrow.  And that means we've spent a 

considerable amount of time fluffing and sprucing things up around our house.  

You know how a party forces you to get your act together!  

I think we're pretty well set....if the dog gone rental company would show up already!!

On Sunday, we are leaving for our summer vacation.  Nothing big and fancy this year, but we are all looking forward to it.  Everybody say it with me "ROAD TRIP!!!"

We are headed down the California Coast and spending time in Santa Barbara, 

San Luis Obispo and Carmel.  We're traveling with dear friends and their kids, 

and we always have a great time together.  

This will be no exception. 

When we get home both kids will have 2 separate orientations on 2 different days, school shopping, football practice, and making time to visit the fair 

before the kids head back to school on 8/17.  

Can you believe it?!?  

It's here....the start of school....just. like. that.

I promise to recap the party, our trip and my {half} marathon training as soon as I can.  

In the mean time, I hope you'll be enjoying the last dog days of Summer 

like I know we will be.

Love and hugs,

Carrie

Marathon?

Last year some friends of mine participated in the Nike Women's {half} Marathon.  They asked me to join them, but I politely declined {it went something like "Are you effin' craZy?}.  Then I learned that you receive a silver Tiffany Necklace upon completion of the event ~ and my friends necklace was so cute {they can't be bought...must be earned.  Yada Yada} that I thought I would try and run the race this year.

Here's the deal ~ the Nike Women's {half} Marathon is super duper popular thus, 

difficult to enter.  So there's a random drawing in April and my name wasn't drawn. :-(

Whaaaaaahhhh 

{said like Snooki from Jersey Shore.  Not that I watch that trash}  

Two dear friends did get in and have been forcing encouraging me 

to continue to try and somehow get into the race. 

Which leads me to today....

Our local running store has been given a few bibs by Nike 

and they're raffling them off.  

In order to "win" a spot, you have to enter the raffle daily for a week 

and at the end of the week, they'll draw names for each bib they have available to the.  Another drawing!  

The last one wasn't really in my favor and I'm not confident this one will be either.  

So, I went into the store today and completed my raffle form.  

I haven't totally decided if I'm hoping to get in or not.  

October 16th is right around the corner and let's face it, 

I haven't started training which means I have a LOT of work to do.  

Oh, and by the way ~ I'm not a runner.  

The farthest I've run is a 10k and I wanted strangle my "friends" at the end.  

Everything was going fine until I saw mile marker 2 which was especially disappointing because I thought I was nearly finished with the race.  

It wasn't pretty.

I'll keep you posted on my entry status...

Hugs!

Carrie